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The 2 Sides of Stress: The Life of a Solopreneur


You're grinding away, building your one-person empire.

The dream is big, but man, the stress is bigger.

Ever feel like you're juggling too many balls, and they're all on fire? 🤹‍♂️🔥Yeah, me too.

It's an all-too-common struggle for one-person business owners like us.

At times, the stress can become too much to bear, leading us to question if it's all even worth it.

The pressure to succeed, the fear of failure - it’s an endless cycle.

But this can actually be good,
Because not all stress is bad…

I’m not just going to tell you to look on the bright side more often
(although that’s not a bad aim)…

There’s a certain kind of stress you should never avoid because it’s actually good for you.

This entry aims to serve as a simple lesson and an uplifting encouragement.
​(I think we can all use a good boost of encouragement today)

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Are Eustress’ed Out?

Eustress: a positive form of stress having a beneficial effect on health, motivation, performance, and emotional well-being.

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Eustress is like that friend who pushes you to be better.
It doesn’t usually feel too fun when you’re going through it.

Because….
stress is still stressful…

But eustress has a big payoff in the end.


For example:

  • Weightlifting: Builds muscle and character.

  • Extra Hours Before a Launch: Pays off in success.

  • Nervous Before a Meeting: Means you care.

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Think back to your senior year of high school….

For me, this was in Mason, OH (a suburb outside of Cincinnati) in 2009…


I was convinced I would make it as a rock star and not need to go to college, but I enrolled as a fallback plan. I sold my pretty cringey, debut album out of my backpack in between classes.

I was in a very rocky high school relationship, applying for college, showing up late first period every day, and hanging on by a thread cause I really didn’t care about school at all my senior year, and was forced to take the big SAT exams so I could even be considered for university…

It was stressful - lots of pressure and on the cusp of big life changes.

But it built me up.
It helped me grow in a variety of ways.
And looking back I cherish those memories and how they’ve shaped me.

Eustress’s are good.
In fact, they’re mandatory in building a great life and business.

They expand our comfort zones and capabilities.

Now let’s look at the other side of the coin.

The Bad Stress: Distress

Distress is the stress that just drags you down, with little to no good to come out of it.

You may or may not remember, but for the first time in over a year, I missed my Monday morning newsletter deadline this past August…

I was in the hospital.

I’ll spare the gore-y details, but recently, on July 22nd, 2023 I experienced a freak dirtbike accident that had me rushed to the hospital where I had 2 emergency surgeries and spent 9 days in the burn unit - it’s a painful floor to be on - everyone is in agony there.

This happened the same week that I lost my highest paying client who easily accounted for 80% of my business revenue and subsequently my family’s budget requirements (I’m still licking my financial wounds if I’m honest…).

It’s just shitty. No 2 ways about it.

And what was there to gain from it? Well for one, I have an outstanding balance of over $250k in medical bills…

I’m not here to throw my own pity party.
I’m here to tell you that I get it.

You and me, we’re human you see…

And written in that contract of life we all signed, is the promise that bad things happen from time to time.

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Like:

  • Burnout: Been there, done that.

  • Losing Clients: Ouch.

  • Financial Hardship: No joke.

  • Death of a loved one: Never easy, no matter what.

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ChatGPT told me that the top 5 stresses that Solopreneurs face are:

  1. Financial Stress

  2. Overwork and Burnout

  3. Stress from Isolation

  4. Uncertainty and Lack of Control (ironic right?)

  5. Performance Anxiety

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41.8 million individuals out of the total small business owners in the United States identify as solopreneurs with zero paid employees.
[source: t.ly/IwFxZ]

Many of these individuals experience the stresses listed above to varying degrees.

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The problem might not be the actual stress itself though…

Your Stress-O-Meter Might Be Out of Whack…

We often look at all stress as bad.
But we need to categorize our current stresses.

The positive stresses shouldn’t be avoided, but instead navigated with the intention of improving our life or business in the process.
​
Lean into the eustress - embrace the pain.

The negative stresses can then be accurately understood for what they truly are, and can then be weighed out in a hierarchy of the most negatively impacting stresses to your current situation and self.

Then it becomes the question of how to reduce or eliminate as much distress as possible.

For the things that are out of our control, for example, the loss of a loved one, we can practice healthy coping mechanisms to alleviate any additional stress that could surface if not handled in a healthy manner.
​

Some things just happen and we can’t avoid it or control the situation or the outcome. But the majority of the time we have quite a bit more say in the outcome than we often realize.
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​The challenge lies in taking responsibility for the narrative of our story.
​
- to play the Victor, not the Victim.

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Yet… Even in unavoidable, uncontrollable circumstances, we always have the power to control our response.

…easier said than done, I know.

đź“ť Action Items

  1. Flip the Script: Next time you're nervous, see it as a sign that you're onto something meaningful.

  2. Prioritize Your Stress: Make a list of your distress factors. Tackle them one by one.

  3. Control Your Response: You can't control everything, but you can control your response. Choose wisely.

Life throws curveballs.
Like my freak dirt bike accident.
Massive medical bills, lack of income, and my inability to help my wife with the kids…

Stressful? You bet.
But I had a choice in how I responded.

Stress is a part of life, but you've got the power to decide how it affects you.

Lean into the good stress and manage the bad.

It’ll sharpen and shape you in a way that nothing else can.

You've got this.

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Til Next Time ✌️🙂
Ev